who needs chocolate? i got a legume for easter

Bright and early last Saturday morning noon, Wilzie and I strolled power-walked, hand in hand, down the Magnificent Mile.  We had one destination in mind – Tiffany –  and neither hoards of people nor swooping birds would deter us me.

As we walked ino the store, I quickly scoped out the jewellery cases before moving on.  I wasn’t interested in the watches or solitaires – I was single-minded in my focus…

I. want.  my.  BEAN.

I was directed up the stairs, and scanned all the displays before I finally landed on the Elsa Peretti designs.

I had already memorized the website, so I knew exactly what I wanted…the bean comes in 3 different sizes, and I had already made up my mind that I wanted the middle size.  When I looked at the selections, the salesman told me they come in “mini”, “small” and “regular”.

Very shrewd marketing, Tiffany, because now the middle size – which I had already determined was perfect –  suddenly seemed so…small.

I looked at Wilzie, knowing that the small definitely fit our budget better, and he just shrugged and said “Get whichever one makes you happy*.”

*Translation:  “I don’t want to hear you complain for years to come that the damn bean is too small.”

I turned back to the salesman and happily pointed to the “regular”.

I watched, grinning like a crazy woman, as he slipped the necklace into the little, blue velvet bag, then placed it in the little, blue box, tied it with the white ribbon, and finally dropped it in the little, blue shopping bag.**

**I have heard it said that true happiness doesn’t come from “things” but from “experiences” and I can say, in all honesty, that buying this one “thing” was certainly an “experience”.

I dragged Wilzie back to the hotel so I could document the unveiling of the bean:

The damn thing is TOO SMALL!

Not the actual bean…the actual, “regular” sized bean was fine, but the chain it comes on is too small to fit around my (obviously) enormous neck and was choking me and getting lost in between my neck folds.

I lost it! was bit upset.  When Wilzie called the store, he was told that I could bring it in to have the chain lengthened, and it would be ready in a week and a half.  And to ship it back to me – in Canada – would cost extra (approximately another $50!).  BUT…(here comes the sales pitch) they do have a “large” bean that comes on a longer chain, and we were more than welcome to come on back and pay the difference for the more expensive piece.

I dropped the offending necklace back into the little, blue velvet bag, I tossed that into the little, blue box (not bothering to tie the white ribbon), and finally chucked the box into the little, blue shopping bag.  Cursing the entire time and vowing to return the necklace and to never buy anything from that oppressive, scammy store again!

Wilzie just stood calmly by, hands in his pockets, until I ran out of steam and my eyes dried up.  “Don’t worry about it,” he said, “they are putting the larger one on hold.  We’ll see how it looks and make sure it fits.”

The entire walk back to the store, I was adamant that I did not want the larger bean.  It was ridiculous that it only comes in one  chain length.  It was a scam; a way to force people to pay more for something that fits, and I wasn’t going to play into their money-grubbing hands!

Wilzie led me into the store, walked up to the salesman, explained what happened and, ignoring my protests, asked to see the larger bean that was on hold for us.

I tried it on, and it fit perfectly (Bastards!).  I looked up at Wilzie and reminded him that it was much more than we had originally planned on spending (remember, the original plan was to get the “small”).  He just shrugged and said “If I was picking it out, this is the one I would have picked for you anyway…the other one was too small.  This one is perfect.”

“Did you want to wear out?”  asked the perceptive salesman.

And I did.

This is why I have the best husband in the whole world.  Not because he buys me expensive things (because he doesn’t very often), but because he knows what makes me happy – and whether its taking me for a greasy burger after a hard day at work and letting me eat the last french fry, or going on a slow, terrifying ferris wheel ride with me, or buying me a big bean to wear around my neck, he does what it takes to make his life easier make me smile.

***My apologies – this didn’t start out to be an I-have-the-best-husband-ever post, but that is just where the narrative took me.  Rest assured that I find it just as sickeningly sweet as you do.  Plus, I get the bonus of having to listen to countless renditions of: “But remember how awesome I was when I bought you that bean?”whenever Wilzie does something to annoy me (which happens a lot).

7 thoughts on “who needs chocolate? i got a legume for easter

  1. I don’t think you will ever regret getting it.

    Every girl deserves something from Tiffany’s once in her life.

    I am happy you got the one that fit!

    that is all

  2. And here I thought I had the best husband in the world. Wilzie is giving Bill a run for his money.

    I am happy you now have your big bean. No sense in spending mucho dinero on something you don’t love and that doesn’t fit.

    What exactly is the bean all about? Does Tiffany’s in Chicago make a bean pendant because of that big bean sculpture you like so much? And why a bean? I thought Boston was Beantown. I’m so confused!

  3. who knew a legume could look so good?! around one’s neck no less 😉

    kudos to Wilzie for knowing what to do to make you smile with the fortunate side effect of making his life easier 😀

  4. Yeah…I have an Elsa Peretti heart and the chain is super short. The longer chain with the bigger heart…that I really wanted…is like 5 times as much. Now it just sits in my jewelry box. It was a total waste of money.

    Good decision to get the large. It looks fantastic on you.

  5. It is always better to wait to save the money for the item you want rather than get the second-best option. Second-best is a waste of money — believe me, I have wasted so much money and heartache on second-best.

    Wilzie is wise; I think this is a man-thing. My husband does the same. He would rather buy the thing that looks the best, even if it costs more, than get the item that meets the previously designed budget but won’t suffice. Some men can be amazingly perceptive and tasteful!

    I like the big bean on you – it works!

  6. Hello!

    Yesterday I just posted about my “out of the blue” craving for the bean! Adrienne read my posting and told me there is another woman who has/had the same craving. You are so right, the necklace is damn short. I checked the length and compared it with my oldest necklace, with a pendant with my sign of the zodiac – I got the necklace as a gift when I was a baby, you can tell, the necklace is short. Nevertheless I want to go for the 16 or max. 18mm bean. Right now it is getting delivered to the store from somewhere in the world.
    Maybe you like to take a look at my yesterday’s posting, I also link to my zodiac-necklace.

    Your husband sounds a lot like Mr Paula. A LOT! Only he would not want to buy me a vegetable. Not even a legume.

    Good to know they lengthen the necklaces, I will ask them in Vienna if this is possible around here, too.

    Have a nice day!
    Paula from Vienna

    PS: I could never buy jewelry without trying it on. Scares me.

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